The Republic of Final Island is a mammoth, genial nation, remarkable for its parental licensing program, avowedly heterosexual populace, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 8.293 billion Final Islandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 69.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Final Islandian economy, worth 767 trillion GOlds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 92,500 GOlds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

Wildlife parks are packed with poachers yet increasingly devoid of animals, the nation's politicians are acknowledged as the most polite in the region to the dismay of comedians everywhere, military officers are given medals for disobeying orders, and school uniforms are compulsory. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Final Island's national animal is the Clam, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Final Island is ranked 174,722^nd in the world and 533^rd in The grimy backyard of Bigej for Smartest Citizens, with 26.84 quips per hour.